Healing Space | What New Zealand PM Jacinda Ardern's resignation says about taking back control back

Jacinda Ardern has said she'll step down from her post as New Zealand Prime Minister by February 7, 2023.

Gone are the days when young women were ‘grateful’ for ‘opportunity’ and sat meekly before a hiring squad not negotiating their pay. Whether you are Simone Biles, Naomi Osaka or Jacinda Ardern, or one of the nearly 2 million women who quit the workforce in 2022 according to the National Women’s Law Centre citing US statistics, in India that figure is thought to be 21 million, the way women negotiate their work life has changed.

A McKinsey report found that women were more likely to quit their jobs during the pandemic for the sake of their children. Economists and sociologists call this the ‘motherhood penalty’, women are routinely penalized for getting pregnant, taking maternity leave, having a larger share of household responsibilities, etc. And it’s a huge contributor to the gender pay gap. India sits at 140 out of 156 nations ranked on the 2021 Global Gender Gap Index ranking, (2021). And all this is true and valid. Toxic and unequal work environments, unfair work practices and inequality at home in terms of unpaid labour, all need to be urgently and systemically addressed.

That being said, there is another factor that economists and social observers routinely ignore: women’s mental health.

The economic assumption made is that given a choice between a work opportunity and family, whether that’s a child or some form of self-engagement, perhaps being caregiver to elderly parents, the woman would naturally choose employment. Several household studies from organisations such as UNDP show that Indian women are often breadwinners, and work longer hours than men, but receive less recognition. Indeed, women’s employment has been vital to boosting the middle-class bottom line, contributing a 90 percent income gain for their families over decades. However, they contribute earnings to the household kitty and do not keep their earnings for themselves. Work environments continue to be patriarchal, and often a boy’s club. Several also do not find a reduction in household work or increased sharing of responsibilities. So, they end up working hard on both fronts and have less time and energy for themselves or their families.

The past few years have seen a gain in psychoeducation, in part due to mental health advocacy and the media focus on it, and in part simply due to the sheer pressure of work-life that forces people to stop in their tracks. The increased insight into women’s mental health has brought a necessary focus on depression, anxiety, systemic oppression, self-awareness, self-worth. Over 25 percent of women in India suffer from depression and anxiety.

So, when Ardern says: “I no longer have enough in the tank” and Biles cites her mental health, they speak for women who are choosing to focus on themselves. While economists and sociologists decry women bowing out due to burnout or pressures, citing these aforementioned inequalities and penalties, the other side of it is, women who bow out of patriarchal power structures to focus on themselves are empowering themselves. Women who say ‘no' to perceived and established power structures are reclaiming their power. Just, this is personal power, and not professional power because often they come to the insight that professional power has come at the cost of personal power.

Women also have a stake in personal power in their families and societies. Structural set-ups are such that they have a say in the education of their children, their upbringing, social relationships, the kitchen is a huge power centre for women, and many who do not earn also have a say in the flow of household expenditure. You'll find many men joking that their wives are their ‘home ministers’. While these may not add up to much in economic terms, they serve the purpose of personal clout within the family structure. Which is why many women will not outsource childcare or cooking: it feels like a surrender of personal power in the family. You’ll find this most commonly among elderly women who even when offered the aid of a cook, will still insist on doing the cooking despite illness such as arthritis or spondylitis. Their power is sublimated through household chores. The order in the home comes from them. This kind of power is also structural and systemic and is ignored by economists because it cannot be quantified.

But beyond this, as mental health awareness grows, women in the workforce are being empowered because they are no longer grateful for the opportunity. They are not seeking validation of an external social structure (alone). And because work, especially in the gig and start-up economy, is flexible, adaptable, and dynamic, it has split full-time employment from monetary independence. This gives women options that allow them to prioritise the things that matter to them. Work is now a means and not the end. The small societal changes add up. Cheaper food delivery options mean they can still cook and find reprieve when they need it without outsourcing the task. They may still gain satisfaction from cooking a meal for a family, or tending to small children with part-time support. Part of the motherhood penalty is other women who choose not to make these choices, (of motherhood) asking why a workplace is inherently unequal for them.

However, each working woman today chooses a ‘child’ of her own, whether that’s travel, fitness, continuing education, care of elders, a pet, or some other investment of emotional energy that also consumes leave, time off, attention and care in varying degrees. And women should absolutely have that choice to invest energy where they deem fit. This has now become the primary function of ‘employment’: a contribution to self-worth. So, the middle- and upper-class woman who is sitting in front of the hiring squad is now asking not merely, do I fit in, will I get the job, but also: how does this job support me to build the life I want for myself?

What is changing as women craft their own personal identities and position their personal power is the workplace is no longer the only source of validation. Women can be entrepreneurs, run home-based businesses, become influencers, make SIPs, small investments, monetize their talents, and use social media to be visible. The workplace is becoming a tool, an instrument of self-worth, and not the end. As a means, it is disposable. What is no longer disposable for women is a sense of self-worth, identity, and personal freedom. And any patriarchal structures that fail to recognize this, will see an exodus of women in even stronger numbers in the years to come.