Humour: How Funnycontrol stretched his truth on International Yoga Day

Stretching your limits has its pros and cons. (Image by Tamba Budiarsana via Pexels)

Dear readers,

I woke up at 7 am to write this article, to feel more connected with my yoga brothers and sis…err acquaintances. But this was a terrible mistake, as my body, which often stretches well beyond 9.30 am, screamed in protest against this stretching of its comfort zone. As my brain started to freeze up from the early rising system shock, I did a few suryanamaskar stretches to get me going. Unfortunately, my upwards motion hit the wall unit, and in the downwards motion, I managed to smash the study table in two.  So I am now afraid of the yoga moves of my mother as I watch out warily for her “belan-asana.”

As I googled to research this article, the first headline that caught my eye was “Deepika Padukone successfully nails the Extended Puppy Pose. Here’s why you should try it”. If you’re an investor in debt securities, you may want to consider doing the Extended Puppy Pose in front of Jerome Powell and ask him to stop his relentless bhujangasans with interest rates.  Because every time he breathes in before the next FOMC meeting, the whole financial world holds its breath. And only releases when they hear the words “we have taken a pause on the pause to pause hikes while remaining open to the possibility of accommodating a pause in pausing”.

The only thing more flexible than yoga today is the truth. Lately, many a financial influencer and independent registered adviser has been slapped with a SEBI asana to the extent that they are wondering if there is even any difference. Social media, of course, has inspired many of us to do yoga, so we upload photos and videos to encourage more people to post more photos and videos. In this way we hope to collectively discover our peace of mind asana.

But even as I write this, the Wagner group is waging a proxy war against the Russian government itself instead of Ukraine. So to quote the yogi Leo Tolstoy: “All is fair in war and peace because in the end the whole must surrender to the hegemony of the US dollar”.