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Beware, these 5 'sneaky' saboteurs can undermine your relationship

Relationship tips: Fostering a successful relationship requires continuous effort, self-awareness, and a willingness to prioritise the health of the partnership, rather than solely focusing on individual needs. Here are 5 sneaker relationship saboteurs, as per the expert.

April 08, 2025 / 17:10 IST
In a healthy relationship, both partners should balance their personal needs with the needs of the partnership. (Image: Canva)

A strong and lasting relationship is rooted in essential elements like communication, honesty, trust, and respect. However, even the most well-intentioned actions can sometimes unintentionally undermine the bond we share with our partner.

Relationship therapist Kasturi M identifies these as "sneaky relationship saboteurs" — behaviours that can quietly erode the foundation of a partnership. In an insightful Instagram post, she encouraged followers to reflect on their role in the relationship: “A healthy connection is one that is nurtured consciously. Are you mindful of how you contribute to your bond?”








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A post shared by Kasturi M ~ Relationship Therapist • Inner Child Coach • Author (@heymisstherapist)


Here are the 5 sneaky relationship saboteurs:

  • Overlooking small acts of gratitude

At times, the little things like saying 'thank you', offering compliments, or showing affection may seem trivial, especially in long-term relationships. However, Kasturi emphasises their significance. She explains that when these acts of kindness become less frequent or neglected, one or both partners may start to feel unappreciated or overlooked. Over time, this can slowly erode the emotional intimacy that keeps the relationship strong.
  • Letting conflicts simmer

Disagreements are a natural part of any relationship, but ignoring or avoiding their resolution can allow issues to grow larger. When tough conversations are avoided, or underlying problems remain unaddressed, resentment and tension build, leaving the relationship vulnerable to instability. Kasturi warns that unresolved conflict can cause lasting damage to the relationship's foundation.
  • Passive-aggressive behaviour

Open and honest communication is a cornerstone of any healthy partnership. However, passive-aggressive behavior—such as using sarcasm, making subtle digs, or offering backhanded compliments—undermines trust and transparency. These seemingly minor actions can confuse or hurt the recipient, which can ultimately harm the relationship by breaking down communication and trust.

Also Read | Relationship tips: 7 simple ways to strengthen your bond and have a happy marriage

  • Lack of emotional support

Kasturi highlights that failure to support each other’s goals and aspirations is a major, yet often overlooked, relationship saboteur. She points out that neglecting to actively encourage each other during challenging times or dismissing each other’s dreams creates feelings of isolation and insecurity. Over time, this lack of mutual support fosters emotional disconnection, potentially leading to resentment and dissatisfaction in the relationship.
  • Selfishness over partnership needs

In a healthy relationship, both partners should balance their personal needs with the needs of the partnership. This requires compromise and making decisions that benefit the relationship as a whole. However, when one partner consistently places their own desires above the needs of the relationship, it can lead to imbalance, resentment, and emotional distance.

Also Read | Want a healthy relationship? Lifestyle coach says these are the 2 things you need

Kasturi’s advice reminds us that fostering a successful relationship requires continuous effort, self-awareness, and a willingness to prioritise the health of the partnership, rather than solely focusing on individual needs.

Disclaimer: This article only provides generic information. Don’t treat it as a substitute for qualified medical opinion. Always consult a specialist for specific diagnosis.

MC Lifestyle Desk
first published: Apr 8, 2025 05:10 pm

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