15 racist remarks that have no place in modern conversation

Every day Indians are subjected to racist remarks in the home country. (Representational image: Polina Kovaleva via Pexels)

Big brands are cutting ties with rapper Ye (formerly known as Kanye West) over his anti-Semitic and racist remarks. He is not the only racist human on this planet, of course. Every day Indians are subjected to racist remarks in the home country. India is so high on the racism hierarchy that in two different and independent racism studies (The Washington Post [2013] and Business Tech [2016]) with 85,000 samples from 61 countries, India emerged as the most racist country surveyed. Approximately, 44 percent of all Indians who took the survey said that they would not be comfortable with neighbours who were of a different culture, ethnicity, or race while 64.3 percent admitted that they were either discriminated against or had witnessed discrimination unfold in their home country.

1. Seriously, you are a Bihari? You do not look or sound like one.

So, what do Biharis look like? A horn on their head? Large ears like a fennec fox? A caul on their face? Four noses like a slug? Shed the stereotypes!

And don’t we have the same vocal cords? Or did you hear a Bihari bray, neigh or trumpet?

As for the much-maligned Bihari drawl, well, we all have an accent, don’t we?

2. That Madrasi/ Chinky/ Insert region/ ethnicity.

Duh! Ever seen a map of India?

Brush up your geography, people. Not all South Indians are Madrasis. They could be Tamil, Kannadigas, Keralites, Andhraites, Telanganites. Technically. Madras doesn’t even exist any more.

And North-Easterners having eyes with epicanthic folds is genetics, my dear. Stop being derogatory.

3. She is so dark/brown/black.

Next time you hear this, repeat what Maya Angelou had said: “Phenomenal woman, that's me!” Give back to those indulging in melanin count. (Including some TV shows about a top honcho falling in love with a superb girl despite the colour of her skin - yuck.)

Wheatish or coffee colour may be okay on a shade card. But human faces are not walls or furniture, are they?

4. Matrimonial ad: Looking for a convented docile girl.

First, read Basic English for Dummies. And if you are looking for anyone ‘convented’, head to the cloister for nuns.

5. Why haven’t you settled down?

I am settled. I have a home. I have a job. I have beautiful friends. I am happy. Ah! You mean why isn’t she/he married? You think marriage is the only definition of settled? The dictionary doesn’t. Settle means: resolve or reach an agreement about (an argument or problem). Pay a debt or account.

6. Oh, you learnt _______ (insert Persian, Sanskrit, Hebrew or any language of your choice). Did they try to convert you?

No, not everyone is a fanatic. Not everyone is an evangelist. A crusader. Language has no religion. Wake up, Mr Prejudice.

7. He is habshi, he is so dark.

Next time, someone uses Habshi as a slur, tell them Habshi is an exotic seedless black grape variety that was introduced in the Deccan region along with grape varieties named Bokhari, Abi, Sahebi. Shut the racist with grape-gyan.

8. Gora-chitta vs kalaa

That’s colourism. The funny thing is, the word colourism doesn’t even exist. Not officially. It does not appear in the dictionary. It autocorrects on one’s computer screen.

9. You Southies have brains, we north Indians have looks.

Obviously, everyone has a brain (unless they are a sea-sponge). And looks? Brother, looks aren't anyone's monopoly.

10. He is so stingy, must be a Marwari/Bania/Jew.

Whoever told you stinginess is race-specific? Generosity
and stinginess are individual traits. Don’t blame it on a race.

11. You are a Punjabi, you must eat aloo-parantha with butter for breakfast.

Not all Punjabis like potato-stuffed paranthas (especially for breakfast), and not everyone who like aloo paratha (even for breakfast) is Punjabi!

12. Their food is stinky.

Food is a personal choice, don’t question it. Watch the 2020 film Axone to understand how racist and discriminatory we are in terms of other people’s food choices.

13. That’s so gay.

Why doesn’t anyone ever say That’s so straight? Being gay is a sexual orientation, it is not an adjective.

14. That’s so Brahmin of him.

As in…. What does this even mean?

15. You people…

Stop bunching individuals into “you people” category. Everyone is different, there is no such specie as “you people”.

Finally, don't use Shylock ('Merchant of Venice') as short-hand for cunning or money-minded. You know what has happened to Kanye West for his anti-Semitic remarks. Learn from him. If you are haggling, say, you are haggling for a better price, not jewwing the seller.