How to move on after getting out of a toxic relationship

Relationship tips: When you are out of a toxic relationship, don't blaming yourself but gain insights and grow from the experience (Image: Canva)

Breaking free from a toxic relationship can be a challenging and transformative experience. Toxic relationships often leave deep emotional scars, and moving on from them requires a deliberate and compassionate approach. Here’s a comprehensive guide to help you navigate this crucial phase of your life and emerge stronger and more resilient:

Acknowledge your feelings

The first step towards healing is acknowledging your emotions. It is normal to feel a mix of relief, sadness, anger, and confusion after leaving a toxic relationship. Give yourself permission to experience these feelings without judgement. Journaling can be a helpful way to process your emotions, allowing you to gain clarity and perspective.

Seek support

You do not have to go through this alone. Reach out to friends, family, or a professional therapist who can provide a safe space for you to express your feelings and gain support. Therapy can be particularly beneficial, offering tools to understand your experiences and build healthier relationships in the future.

Establish boundaries

Setting boundaries is essential for your emotional well-being. This might mean cutting off all contact with your ex-partner, at least temporarily. If cutting contact is not possible, establish clear boundaries to protect your mental health. Block their number, unfollow them on social media, and avoid places where you might run into them.

Focus on self-care

Prioritising self-care is crucial during this time. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Exercise, meditation, and hobbies can help reduce stress and improve your mood. Ensure you are eating well, getting enough sleep, and maintaining a healthy routine. Self-care is not just about physical well-being but also about nurturing your emotional and mental health.

Reflect and learn

Take time to reflect on the relationship and identify patterns or behaviours that were toxic. This self-reflection can help you understand what went wrong and why. Learning from these experiences can prevent you from repeating the same mistakes in future relationships. It is not about blaming yourself but about gaining insight and growing from the experience.

Rebuild your identity

Toxic relationships can erode your sense of self. Rebuilding your identity involves rediscovering your passions, strengths, and values. Engage in activities that reinforce your sense of self-worth and independence. This might include pursuing new hobbies, furthering your education, or embarking on a new career path. Surround yourself with positive influences that support your growth and well-being.

Take your time

Healing is a process that cannot be rushed. Allow yourself the time you need to recover fully. Do not feel pressured to move on quickly or enter a new relationship immediately. Focus on your personal growth and healing. Each person’s journey is unique, and it is essential to honour your own pace.

Embrace positivity

Surround yourself with positivity and seek out experiences that uplift you. This can include spending time with loved ones who make you feel valued, engaging in activities that make you happy, and practising gratitude. Positive affirmations and visualisations can also help shift your mindset towards a more hopeful and optimistic outlook.

Create new goals

Setting new goals can provide a sense of direction and purpose. Whether these goals are related to your personal life, career, or hobbies, having something to work towards can motivate you and boost your confidence. Break down your goals into manageable steps and celebrate your progress along the way.

Accept and forgive

Acceptance and forgiveness are vital components of healing. Accept that the relationship was toxic and that it is now a part of your past. Forgive yourself for any mistakes you might have made and forgive your ex-partner for their behaviour. Forgiveness does not mean condoning their actions but rather freeing yourself from the burden of anger and resentment.

Connect with others

Building new connections can be incredibly healing. Join clubs, groups, or classes that interest you and meet new people who share your passions. Positive social interactions can enhance your mood and help you form meaningful relationships based on mutual respect and support.