Funnycontrol | 9 lessons investors can learn from ISRO

Aditya L1 solar mission will study the outer atmosphere of the Sun (Image credit: ISRO)

The Indian Space Research Organisation (ISRO) is on a roll. After landing Chandrayaan 3 - softly - near the south pole of the moon, ISRO sent the Aditya L1 up to study the sun. As is the wont of discerning investors, they can find investment lessons in national and scientific feats, too. Here's to getting that ball rolling:

1) Live on a shoestring budget: ISRO achieved the moon landing with a budget below Interstellar. Now stop to take stock of your portfolio; research, trim, adjust for take-off.

2) Go sideways to move forward: Chandrayaan first spun orbits around the earth, then it spun orbits around the moon till finally it was withing landing green card distance. This is how most Indians get to go abroad, by first spinning within the system, then finding ways to spin out of it.

3) Aim for the sun as soon as you kiss the moon: Barely had we landed near the lunar south pole that we began aiming for the sun. In the same way, before you can recover from your losses in the domestic markets, you should start aiming overseas. That way you can boast online about your losses in USD.

4) Avoid showing any bumps in the journey: Pragyan found a crater in its path as soon as it stepped off the lander. So ISRO skipped the video portion of the rover struggling in and out of it and directly showed its onward journey. Be suitably selective in sharing your investing screenshots online.

5) Commodity trading in elements: Pragyan found many elements like sulphur, oxygen and Rajinikanth’s sunglasses on the moon’s surface. Start making strategies for interstellar commodity trading. Consider Mars soyabean futures expiring in 30 Mars years.

6) Always take a selfie: The Aditya L1 took a selfie with the Earth and the moon on its way to the sun. (At this point, the earth and moon were feeling like the food mall on the expressway where Mumbaikars click photos enroute to Pune.) Take a selfie with each day's gains and losses, and soon photo apps will send you video suggestions to capture your mood quarter-on-quarter.

7) Do a second jump just to show people you are still alive: Like the stock price of any PSU whenever talk of disinvestment is in the air. Vikram Lander did a second jump after it had successfully managed to land the first. Just like Vikram, the disinvestment talks will also settle down by the time elections end but at least there will be a brief jump in your otherwise gasping-for-oxygen portfolio.

8) Rely on automation to avoid human error: ISRO knows that human beings cannot stop fooling around if you leave them with any controls. So the final landing and rover is moving automatically. Now if only you had done the same with your stop loss and not tried to time the market...

9) Remember to thank the Japanese even when they arrive late: ISRO congratulated the Japanese Space Agency for the launch of its moon lander even though it is late to the party. In similar fashion, thank the Bank of Japan when it raises interest rates unravelling the entire carry trade and watch your losses rocket to the moon the same time that Japan lands on it.