Decoding employees' fear of interacting with managers

The hesitation to be approached certainly has two sides—the lack of a speak-up culture and a perceived power dynamic.

At a company that he used to work at, one of Sanjay Jha’s colleagues, Praveen*, who had been with the firm for over a year, always tried his best to meet his targets and usually exceeded expectations. However, he always got cold feet when it came to dealing with his line boss.

Jha, who is presently the chief human resources officer (CHRO) and senior vice president of business development and OEM relations at Mahindra First Choice Wheels, remembered that every time Praveen was summoned to the manager’s office, he lost his nerve. Praveen told Jha that he felt like he was about to be scolded, even though he wasn't aware of any major mistakes that he had made.

Mostly due to the manager’s stern expression on her face, Praveen’s fear only grew worse. It wasn't until he spoke to others that Praveen realised he wasn't alone. “But after a brief discussion, they got to know that the manager was simply trying to push her employees in the interest of the organisation,” Jha said.

Despite being great at their jobs and keeping things on an even keel in office, many employees flounder when it comes to interacting with managers even before beginning the main conversation. In spite of discussing with managers directly or asking for solutions from their colleagues, employees usually suffer from the imposter syndrome—a situation where feelings of self-doubt are reinforced—and sometimes resort to professional help.

Mazher Ali, psychiatrist at CARE Hospitals, Hyderabad, has seen cases of several talented employees who consistently exceeded targets and were highly regarded by peers. However, they struggled when communicating with managers. Several such instances of hesitation pile up on employees, eventually resulting in a skewed employee-manager power dynamic and a fear of judgement seeping in.

Why does this happen?

The recent HDFC Bank case, where an  officer was heard shouting at his junior colleagues for not selling enough banking and insurance products, highlights the presence of toxicity at the workplace despite the increased importance of empathic leadership in the post-pandemic environment. Such cases are not isolated.

However, the hesitation to be approached certainly has two sides—the lack of a speak-up culture and a perceived power dynamic. When a 2023 survey by ethics assessment firm Ethisphere asked employees if there was misconduct at their workplace, Gen Zs (those born between 1990-2010) were way ahead of other age cohorts in saying ‘No’. This was mostly because they didn't believe any corrective action would happen.

“People often instinctively play it safe by keeping quiet. Their frequent conclusion is: When in doubt, keep your mouth shut,” said Sriharsha Achar, CHRO at Star Health and Allied Insurance.

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Employees also believe—“again, without direct experience”—that their bosses would feel betrayed if constructive ideas for change were offered when people more senior than they were present or that their bosses would feel embarrassed to be shown up by a subordinate in front of others, he added.

Nevertheless, toxic bosses and toxic workplaces emerged as the top two reasons for the great Indian resignation, contrary to the popular perception about employees quitting for better opportunities or higher salaries.
According to report by e-learning firm Harappa, more than 50 percent of employees said they quit because of toxic bosses who fostered unhealthy competition between colleagues and discounted their well-being. Toxic workplaces emerged as the second most-dominant reason with 54 percent of employees blaming office politics and unethical employers.

How to solve it?

First and foremost, HR experts suggest employees do away with the notion that a manager is an unreasonable person with unchecked powers.

However, Himanshu Misra, head of HR at Axis Asset Management Company, said employees need to do their homework and prepare for the conversation since time is precious for both stakeholders. “Be clear about your ask along with rationale/logic before the discussion, " he said, adding that it is always advisable to avoid the seemingly impromptu conversation in a corridor or lift; instead, block time in advance and share the subject of the conversation, if possible.

Secondly, conversations should be consistent where feedback should be in focus. According to Dr Ali, this demonstrates a growth mindset and a commitment to improvement.

In case the struggle continues even after one or two months, employees are suggested to seek support from HR representatives who can help navigate the situation. “Do not punish yourself by avoiding your manager,” Mahindra’s Jha said.

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For managers, it is advised that regular conversations other than work-related ones should find a place in their busy schedules. Very recently, a confidence-building exercise at Star Health and Allied Insurance with a young woman took about three months before she could open up and talk about her domestic violence issues. Following that, the firm transferred her, at her request, from her current location to another where the husband could not trouble her, said Achar.