Woman quits after boss tells her to ‘increase pain tolerance’ over menstrual leave: ‘My wife also works’

Woman resigns following manager’s comment on menstrual leave. (AI-generated image)

Menstrual leave for women remains a debated issue in many workplaces, often shaped by policy gaps and personal attitudes rather than medical understanding. How such leave is treated can affect whether employees feel safe raising health concerns at work.

This issue came into focus after a woman shared a Reddit post claiming her manager dismissed her menstrual pain and told her to “increase her pain tolerance” when she took sick leave for severe cramps. The post, titled “He said increase your pain tolerance”, was shared on the r/IndianWorkplace forum and has drawn attention to workplace conduct and employee rights.

The woman said she had taken one sick leave each month for three months due to intense menstrual pain. Despite clearly mentioning the reason in her leave emails, she said her manager called her into his office and questioned her absence, comparing her situation with that of his wife.

“I had taken one sick leave each month for 3 months, because of unbearable pain of menstrual cramps. This guy calls me in the office and asks me about the leaves, even though the reason was clearly mentioned in the emails. His next statement was, even my wife gets periods, but she works. I told him everyone has a different pain tolerance, and I took leaves beacuse the pain made me dizzy, and to which he dared to say, ‘Then increase your pain tolerance’. I mean, are you f***ing kidding me!!”

She said the exchange left her anxious about taking further leave. In her post, she explained, “For two months, I don't know what shitty medicines I took, but I managed to be here, but yesterday I took a leave for the same reason, so I am panicking as to what new drama he'll have planned for today... stay tuned.”

The post drew strong reactions from other Reddit users, many of whom questioned why medical leave was being examined at all. Several users said menstrual pain varies widely and should not be compared or dismissed by managers.

Some advised the woman to escalate the matter to HR and senior management, arguing that medical leave should not be questioned. One user wrote, “I would honestly loop HR and CXO in for this. Say if he gets into an accident tomorrow and breaks his bones, same should be applied to him right? Or of CEO is hurt seeing stocks/KPI plummet, let's use this line again - increase you pain tolerance. Leave this org at earliest, let folks know about who this dude is so that we can be aware next time.”

Others reminded her that employees are entitled to take leave for health reasons and do not have to justify or defend their condition. In a follow-up comment, the woman revealed that she had resigned from the company. She also said her manager planned to deduct money from her final settlement. “I resigned yesterday, and now he wants to deduct the amount he paid for a course, and according to him its not completed as per his satisfaction so he will deduct that from my final settlement. BTW, this was not mentioned in the offer letter. Also its his dad's company so HR and all is not going to work.”

he said "Increase your pain tolerance." byu/Appropriate-Panic936 inIndianWorkplace

Several users said employees should avoid explaining medical leave in detail, as it can invite unnecessary scrutiny. One user commented, “Is he your boss? Do you not have a leave balance? Why is he interfering in your life? Ask him to back off - you can take a leave for whatever reason. Next time don't explain the reason.”

Another suggested addressing the issue directly if it was raised again, “Next time he raises the topic - give him a detailed analysis of different kinds of flow, pain tolerance on the scale of 10 and how it relates to pain faced by men (like being punched). Don’t feel shy and be as graphic as you can.”

Disclaimer: The above incident has been reported based on an unverified Reddit post. Moneycontrol has not independently verified the claims.