Therapist who has worked with over 100 couples reveals 3 'most annoying habits' in relationships

'Most of the time, it’s not the habit itself that breaks a relationship, but rather the refusal to change it,' the relationship expert said. (Representational image: Unsplash)

Psychotherapist and clinical director Jourdan Travers believes that even the strongest and happiest relationships can falter when some annoying habits are left unaddressed. "They slowly pile up until, suddenly, their weight seems unbearable," she said while adding that if left unchecked, these behaviours can drive a wedge between partners.

Travers, who told CNBC Make It that she has worked with more than a hundred couples, revealed the three most common and annoying habits that she has seen destroy relationships:

1.) Assuming your partner knows what you need

"Instead of expressing their needs clearly, many people expect their partners to know exactly what they need, when they need it. But this is an easy way to set yourself up for disappointment," said Travers, adding that clear communication is essential for a strong and healthy relationship and assuming your partner understands your thoughts can be damaging and lead to resentment.

2.) Keeping score

"Healthy relationships can quickly turn sour when couples start tallying up each other’s good deeds and missteps. Once one or both partners 'keep score,' the relationship eventually turns into a competition," Travers told CNBC Make It. "This tit-for-tat mentality often gives rise to a transactional relational dynamic; kindness becomes a means to an end, and it loses all authenticity."

3.) Passive-aggressive behavior

If someone you're with is passive-aggressive, research suggests they're likely feeling unhappy or resentful, and that's a signal you shouldn't ignore, the psychotherapist said. "Not only is it hurtful and confusing, it also leaves partners with no way to move forward," noted Travers.

She, however, added that having these habits doesn't mean that your relationship is broken beyond repair.

"Relationships take work, and that work often starts with catching yourself in the act, taking a breath and choosing a different way forward. So if you find yourself slipping into any of these patterns, or perhaps even getting annoyed by your partner exhibiting them: Talk about it, own it and try again," she said.