He doesn't remember her name. Nor does he know that she's his wife. Yet, 39 years later, Michael O'Reilley (77), suffering from Alzheimer's disease, found the confidence and conviction to ask his wife Linda Feldman if she would marry him. Of course, Feldman replied in the affirmative.
O'Reilley has been living at The Ivy at Berkeley since July. When a staff there came to know about the proposal, the idea to get the lovely couple get married again sprung up. On January 10, in an intimate ceremony, surrounded by caregivers, friends and family, the two of them tied the knot once again.
Want to know how their love story first started? Well, it all began in the year 1979. Both of them belonged to the same profession. They were public defenders in Alameda County. “Someone told me that if I wanted to watch a really good attorney do some closing arguments, I should go watch Michael,” Feldman said. “He was just a brilliant lawyer.”
This is how O'Reilley became a mentor to Feldman. The two of them were married to different people at the time when their camaraderie started to blossom into love. They spent a lot of time together and their bond just grew stronger.
A couple of years later when the two were divorced from their respective partners, O'Reilley asked Feldman out. “I had a young child and was newly divorced, and I just didn’t really know what I wanted to do next,” Feldman told The Washington Post.
Even though Feldman was hesitant, she caved in eventually. What's interesting is how O'Reilley asked Feldman out. It was unique, witty and something he knew Feldman would not have the heart to refuse. He sent a group email to all public defenders asking them if anyone would be interested in watching an autopsy. He knew fully well that Feldman was interested in forensic pathology.
They both went out to watch an autopsy and then headed out for a lunch date. Enjoying each other's company, the two of them decided to move in together with their children. Oh yes! O'Reilley had two daughters from his first marriage and Feldman had one son.
Their journey was not all rosy though, for their children did find it difficult to wrap their heads around their love. This is why the duo chose their living room to get married in 1987, a ceremony devoid of anything extravagant.
Their love story is proof that opposites attract, and well, how! About herself, Feldman said she is a neurotic little Jewish girl and about O'Reilley, she said he is an Irish Catholic thrill-seeker. “We’ve pushed each other in different directions. I love theater and museums, and I’ve introduced him to more of that than he was doing on his own, and he’s pushed me to do things like river rafting, which I probably never would have done,” Feldman shared.
The two of them have travelled extensively together and what kept the spark alive was their ability to talk about anything and everything.
About 7 years ago, O'Reilley was diagnosed with Alzheimer. Standing by him in his difficult time, Feldman served as his primary caregiver for many years. “He couldn’t even walk out the door or he’d get lost,” Feldman said. “He would talk but not make sense.”
Eventually, O'Reilley moved into The Ivy. Feldman has only good things to say about her husband. She's someone who sees the silver lining even when times are tough. She shared that she knows many people suffering from Alzheimer who don't even recognize their spouse at all. However, she finds herself lucky, for O'Reilley continues to keep his arm around her, kiss her and say 'I love you' to her.
It is love stories like this that suffuses one's heart with a lot of warmth and belief that true love can change one forever.
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