When veteran actress Nanda wished to die without pain, told Saira Banu, “Dua karna ki jab main jau toh bina kisi…”

When veteran actress Nanda wished to die without pain, told Saira Banu, “Dua karna ki jab main jau toh bina kisi…”

• Saira Banu recalls Nanda's gentle nature and wish for a peaceful passing
• Nanda passed away in 2014 at age 72, fulfilling her wish for a pain-free death
• Nanda valued privacy, close friendships, and lived simply after retiring in 1995

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On veteran actress Nanda’s birth anniversary, memories of her gentle presence, serene screen persona and deeply personal philosophies feel especially poignant. Among the many voices that have spoken about Nanda over the years, Saira Banu’s recollection stands out for its tenderness and honesty. In a throwback interview from 2014, Saira Banu shared a deeply moving conversation in which Nanda spoke about her wish to leave the world without pain — a wish that, in many ways, reflected the quiet dignity she carried through life.

Nanda with Saira Banu and DIlip Kumar

Saira Banu remembered Nanda not just as a respected senior in the industry, but as someone who embodied grace in its truest sense. “Nanda baaiji, that’s what I called her,” she said, adding that she saw many of her own mother’s qualities in Nanda. “She was gentle, soft-spoken and so unassuming.” There was nothing performative about Nanda’s kindness. It came naturally, without effort or expectation.

The two actresses grew close relatively late in life. Saira Banu recalled that her real interaction with Nanda began when Dilip Kumar worked with her in B R Chopra’s Mazdoor in 1982. “I met her very late. But we struck an instant rapport,” she said. Despite years in the same industry, it took that meeting for a friendship to bloom — one built on shared values rather than shared fame.

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One of the most haunting moments Saira Banu recalled was a conversation where Nanda spoke candidly about death. “She would always say, ‘When I have to go, I want to go without getting into a hospital and going through a lot of pain,’” Saira Banu shared. The actress added, “It seems God does listen to good people. She went exactly the way she had hoped she would.”

Nanda passed away on March 25, 2014, following a heart attack. She was 72. According to Saira Banu, Nanda collapsed suddenly at home in the early hours of the morning. “She came out of the bathroom at 7 a.m. and collapsed. That was it! When death has to come, it should be instant,” she recalled, echoing Nanda’s own words. The simplicity of that moment, free of prolonged suffering, felt like a quiet fulfillment of the prayer Nanda had once voiced.

Born into cinema royalty as the daughter of legendary Marathi actor Master Vinayak, Nanda carved her own path in Hindi cinema. Over four decades, she appeared in more than 65 films, including classics like Gumnaam, Jab Jab Phool Khile and Chhoti Bahen. Yet, despite her success, she remained strikingly detached from the trappings of stardom.

“Not many knew Nanda baaiji well,” Saira Banu said. “She had a tightly cordoned set of friends — Jabeen, Shakila, Waheeda. Later, that group extended to Helen, Sadhana and Asha Parekh.” It was a small, trusted circle, reflecting Nanda’s preference for depth over noise. Fame never dictated her relationships, and publicity never defined her happiness.

Saira Banu also spoke about Nanda’s personal life, marked by both emotional strength and quiet tragedy. “The one thing that she did not have and I do is a soulmate and a life companion,” she said. Nanda had been engaged to filmmaker Manmohan Desai in 1992, but fate intervened cruelly. Desai passed away in 1994 after falling from his balcony, leaving Nanda devastated. “She was ready to marry him and then tragedy struck. I don’t know what happened,” Saira Banu admitted, her words heavy with unspoken sorrow.

Despite heartbreak, Nanda never turned bitter. She lived simply, withdrew from the limelight after retiring in 1995, and chose privacy over public nostalgia. “She wasn’t money-minded at all,” Saira Banu said. “She was happy to be who she was and with whatever she had.” Her home, once filled with the chatter of siblings and relatives, gradually grew quieter as loved ones passed away. Yet, even in solitude, Nanda retained her calm acceptance of life.

Food was another small window into her personality. Saira Banu fondly recalled hosting her at home. “Nanda baaiji was a foodie earlier, but later in life she became a frugal eater,” she said. From enjoying delicacies to eventually giving up dinner altogether, her habits mirrored her increasingly minimalist approach to living.

Perhaps the most touching line Saira Banu shared was one Nanda often repeated as a prayer: “Dua karo jab main jaaoon toh bina kisi takleef ke.” Saira Banu added, “I also wish the same for myself. Jaana toh hum sab ko hai. Just pray that we remain healthy as long as we are here.”