Modelling positive behaviour for children: Be polite, admit to mistakes, and handle stress calmly

Encouraging curiosity and showing that learning is a continuous process can inspire children to value education. (Image: Canva)

Modelling positive behaviour for children is one of the most powerful and effective ways to teach them how to navigate the world. Kids are like sponges—they absorb everything around them, and that includes how adults, especially parents and carers, act in different situations. Whether it's how you handle stress, talk to others, or deal with tough times, children are paying attention and learning from your example.

As a parent, you don’t need to be perfect, but being mindful of the behaviours you want your kids to pick up can go a long way. From showing kindness and honesty to taking responsibility for mistakes, the little things you do every day can shape your child's understanding of how to interact with the world. Even when you’re not trying to teach them a lesson, they’re learning from you just by watching how you handle different situations.

Here are some key behaviours you can model to help shape your child’s growth and character in a positive way.

Respect and kindness

• Children learn how to treat others by watching how they interact with people. Show respect in your everyday interactions, whether it’s with family members, friends, or strangers.
• How to model it: Use polite language, be considerate of others’ feelings, and demonstrate empathy. Show kindness through small actions like holding doors for others, being patient, or offering help.

• Modelling honesty helps children understand the value of truthfulness. Be transparent in your actions and words, and avoid telling white lies, as children pick up on these contradictions.
• How to model it: Admit when you’ve made a mistake and correct it honestly. Emphasise the importance of being truthful even when it's difficult, and praise honesty when your child practices it.

• Children often struggle with managing their emotions, and they learn how to handle anger, frustration, and sadness by watching them. Show them how to handle stress and difficult emotions calmly.
• How to model it: When you're upset, take deep breaths or step away to cool down. Explain your feelings to your child in a calm way, demonstrating that it's okay to feel strong emotions, but how you respond matters.

• Demonstrating good communication skills, such as active listening and expressing your thoughts clearly, sets the foundation for how children will communicate with others.
• How to model it: Make eye contact, listen without interrupting, and show understanding. Encourage open conversations at home where everyone has a chance to speak and feel heard.

• Teaching children to take responsibility for their actions is crucial for their development. Show responsibility in your daily life and encourage accountability in theirs.
• How to model it: Complete tasks you commit to and take ownership of mistakes. If you forget something or do something wrong, acknowledge it and show how to correct it without blaming others.

• Being grateful and maintaining a positive attitude, even during challenging times, helps children develop resilience and a positive outlook on life.
• How to model it: Express gratitude regularly, even for small things. For example, say “I’m thankful for this beautiful day” or “I appreciate your help.” Show optimism when facing challenges.

Healthy habits

• Children learn about physical and mental health from their parents. Whether it's about eating habits, exercise, or taking care of mental health, they will follow your example.
• How to model it: Engage in regular physical activity, eat balanced meals, and make time for self-care. Let your children see you prioritise sleep, hydration, and healthy living.

• Modelling a strong work ethic and perseverance teaches children the importance of effort and persistence in achieving goals.
• How to model it: Show dedication to your work, but also balance it with family time. When faced with challenges, demonstrate problem-solving rather than giving up.

• Teaching children how to apologise and forgive others is essential for maintaining healthy relationships.
• How to model it: If you make a mistake or hurt someone’s feelings, apologise sincerely. Also, show forgiveness when others apologise to you, demonstrating that mistakes are part of growth.

• Encouraging curiosity and showing that learning is a continuous process can inspire children to value education and personal growth.
• How to model it: Be curious yourself—ask questions, read books, and explore new hobbies. Show enthusiasm for learning new things and include your child in educational activities.