Swedengate explained: What is the debate around serving food to guests?

Swedengate: Twitter users were shocked to learn that Swedes don't offer food to guests (Representative Image)

What started as a simple question on Reddit has snowballed into a controversy on cultural norms with the country of Sweden at its centre. #Swedengate is a hashtag that emerged when Twitter learned that Swedes don’t always serve food to guests who are visiting their homes. Given that offering food to guests is considered a basic act of hospitality in many cultures, this particular aspect of Swedish tradition did not go down well with several Twitter users.

It all began with a question on AskReddit. "What's the weirdest thing you had to do at someone else's house because of their culture/religion?" a person asked. One response to the question became the start of what would later become known as ‘Swedengate.’

“I remember going to my Swedish friend’s house. And while we were playing in his room, his mom yelled that dinner was ready. And check this. He told me to WAIT in his room while they ate,” a Reddit user responded.

The response spread online like wildfire. Before long, other people were sharing their own tales of surprising interactions with Swedes and debating their apparent lack of hospitality. The debate gained traction on Twitter, where thousands of people weighed in on the issue, giving birth to the hashtag #Swedengate.

So do the Swedes really not feed their guests?

From the responses on Twitter and Reddit, it is clear that people from Sweden don’t always serve food to their guests, even children.

“The Swedish thinking goes like this: the other child (or the other family) may have plans for another kind of dinner, and you wouldn’t want to ruin the routine or preparations,” a Swede wrote in an op-ed published in The Independent.

“I don’t think it is anything to do with not wanting to feed the other child or because it costs money or anything like that, it’s more to do with tradition and wanting to eat with your own family.”

Swedes agreed.

Swedes cook for the people they expect (family). Precise portions. We don't mind guests, just tell us in advance and we'll add one more. And in Sweden, it's understood, you don't eat at a friends house unannounced. No big deal here.

— micael (@alfabaz) May 30, 2022

As a Swede I wouldn’t say this is really a culture thing. It has more to do with when guests come unsuspected and there isn’t enough food for everyone. We only make enough food we think we will eat. Otherwise they eat with the family. (At least in my experience) — Elliot 6 days till summer (@ranbitties) May 28, 2022

“As a Swede I can confirm that we don’t automatically feed every kid that happen to be inside our home,” one person wrote on Twitter.

As a Swede I can confirm that we don’t automatically feed every kid that happen to be inside our home. Idk, it wasn’t a big deal for me as a kid, we ran home and ate with our own families and met outside again afterwards. I always feed my kid’s friends though, mind you https://t.co/kKkESl7mVT

— Vittra (@Vittra88) May 30, 2022

Nevertheless, the practice did start a raging debate on Twitter, where many were outraged by this apparent lack of hospitality while others contrasted it to cultures where it is considered impolite not to feed a guest.

I lived in Sweden for many years and a friend told me when he’d go stay with his aunt as a kid, she’d send the receipts for food and groceries back to his mom. — Where the Tweets have no name (@andrewthesmart) May 30, 2022

At this point I just want a Swedish person to get married to a Punjabi person and watch the two families clash with the Swedes saying sorry we can't offer you water, please die if you'd like. And Punjabis saying what do you mean you won't eat 5 aloo parathas at 7 am.

— Revs :) (@Full_Meals) May 30, 2022

Where do you stand on this debate?