Ratna Pathak Shah and Naseeruddin Shah have been married since 1982, and their partnership has endured for over four decades. Both are icons in Indian cinema, theatre, and television, known for their craft and uncompromising dedication to performance. Yet despite their shared passion, the couple admits that their biggest arguments often circle back to one subject: what it truly means to be an actor.
In a candid interview with Faye D’Souza on her YouTube channel, Ratna revealed that while their marriage has been built on mutual respect, love, and creative synergy, it has also weathered countless disagreements over their philosophies of acting. “I am not one of those types. I am sorry,” Ratna admitted while recalling her differences with Naseer. “I had lots of arguments with Naseer about this. How can he say that? What happens to me? I don’t feel I will die if I can’t act!”
The crux of their debate lies in how each of them views the profession. Naseeruddin Shah has often described acting as a vocation so demanding that it must feel like a matter of survival. As Ratna recalled, “I am going to quote from Naseer: ‘You shouldn’t want to be an actor unless you feel you will die if you don’t act.’”
For Ratna, though, the perspective is different. Acting, for her, is a source of joy, creativity, and discipline, but not the sole defining purpose of existence. “I love acting, I enjoy it, I do it with extreme concentration and seriousness. But I don’t think that is the only thing I want out of life,” she explained.
This divergence of thought has been a recurring point of contention. “This statement,” Ratna admitted, “led to many heated exchanges between us.” Naseer’s response, however, has always been unwavering: “If you want to be an actor-actor, full-time, career actor then it has to be that important for you.”
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“She said, ‘Lots of acting students come up to him and say, Sir I am going to try for a couple of years and see.’ Naseer would say to them, ‘Just go now, forget about it. You won’t get anything in two years, I can promise you that.’”
To Naseeruddin, the struggles of acting are not short-term hurdles but a lifelong test of resilience. Ratna explained his philosophy: “For Naseeruddin, the choice to act is not about quick results or short-term success. His view is that one must be ready to endure a lifetime of struggle.”
Where Naseeruddin sees acting as an ultimate devotion that must consume one’s life, Ratna takes a more balanced stance. She openly admitted that she values acting deeply but does not want it to overshadow all other aspects of her life. For her, passion and balance can go hand in hand.
“I love acting, but I don’t see it as a matter of life or death,” she said. “Are you willing to wait forever? Are you willing to put up with everything? All the rubbish, all the disappointments? All the pain? There is a lot of pain. So, unless you really feel that you are going to die if you don’t act, then best not to get into this business.”
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