Ghosting can take different forms, such as ignoring phone calls and text messages, unfollowing or blocking someone on social media, or stopping any form of digital communication. According to the Cambridge Dictionary, ghosting is "a way of ending a relationship with someone suddenly by stopping all communication with them." It usually involves unexpectedly cutting off all contact with someone, ending the relationship either suddenly or gradually, usually through digital means.
The silence, whether sudden or gradual, leaves the other person in confusion and distress. What makes ghosting different from other breakup methods is that the person being ghosted is often unaware of what's happening. They are left in sudden silence, trying to understand why communication stopped, leading to confusion and a lack of closure.
Ghosting can burden you with several emotional wounds. However, there are strategies you can follow to overcome the damage and reduce its impact on mental health:
Allow emotions to flow: Experience and express the full range of emotions that you feel when ghosted. Be it be sadness, anger, or confusion, it is importantly to validate your feelings as it can facilitate the healing process.
Practice detachment: Once you have fully experienced your emotions, detach yourself from the situation and the person. Mitch Albom, in his book Tuesdays with Morrie,’ writes, ‘Don’t cling to things, because everything is impermanent... But detachment doesn’t mean you don’t let the experience penetrate you. On the contrary, you let it penetrate you fully. That’s how you are able to leave it.’
Reach out to friends/family: Trust your friends and family to help you pull out of the misery. Talk to them about your pain, it may provide comfort and validation. Alternatively, contact a mental health professional for support and perspective.
Set boundaries: It is important to understand that ghosting reflects the other person's ill intentions and shortcomings, not your own. Establish boundaries to protect yourself from further emotional harm and prioritise your well-being.
Love yourself, more: Practice compassion and self care. Be kind to yourself during this challenging time. Engage in self-care activities that nurture your physical, emotional, and spiritual health.
Focus on self growth: Reframe the experience of ghosting as an opportunity for personal growth and strengthening your inner self. Use the experience as a catalyst for self-reflection and self-improvement.
Limit social media: Constantly scrolling through social media can expose you to reminders of the ghosting incident. To protect your emotional well-being, consider unfollowing or blocking the person if needed. Instead channelise your energy into productive activities that bring you joy and fulfilment.
Time to move on: Take the time to mourn, then find the courage to move forward. Ghosting may hurt, but it doesn't determine your worth or value. By acknowledging your feelings, seeking support, and practicing self-care, you can come out of this experience stronger and more resilient.
Remember, you deserve love, respect, and genuine connections that honour your humanity.
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