Mental health: Educate yourself and offer practical support to someone struggling with depression

Educate yourself about depression

One of the most important steps in supporting someone with depression is to educate yourself about the condition. Understanding the symptoms, causes, and treatments can help you better comprehend what your loved one is going through and avoid misconceptions.

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How to educate yourself:

• Learn about depression: Read reputable resources about depression from mental health organisations or websites. Understand that depression is more than just sadness—it’s a medical condition that can affect a person’s ability to function in daily life.


• Recognise symptoms: Depression can manifest in different ways, such as fatigue, loss of interest in activities, changes in sleep or appetite, irritability, or feelings of hopelessness. Being familiar with these symptoms will help you better understand their experience.


• Acknowledge it’s not their fault: Depression is not a choice or a sign of weakness. It’s important to avoid blaming or shaming the person for their condition and instead approach them with empathy.

Sometimes, the most valuable support you can offer is simply listening. People with depression often feel isolated and misunderstood, and being able to talk openly about their feelings can provide comfort.

How to be a good listener:

• Be present: Offer your full attention when they talk. Put away distractions like your phone and focus on what they’re saying.


• Don’t rush to give solutions: Avoid trying to “fix” their problems or offer unsolicited advice. Instead, listen without judgment and let them express their feelings.


• Validate their feelings: Acknowledge their pain by saying things like, “I’m sorry you’re feeling this way,” or “That sounds really difficult.” Let them know that their emotions are valid, even if you don’t fully understand them.


• "In general, accept a depressed person without expectations of quick change or judgment—let them know they are loved and not alone in their struggles. Your caring can make a real difference," Dr Kim writes.

Encourage them to seek professional help

While your support is valuable, it’s essential for someone with depression to receive professional treatment, such as therapy or medication. Encourage them to seek help from a doctor, therapist, or counsellor.

How to encourage them:

• Be gentle: Suggest seeing a mental health professional in a caring and non-pushy way. For example, you could say, “I care about you and want to make sure you’re getting the help you need. Have you thought about talking to a therapist?”


• Offer to help: Offer to help them find a therapist, make an appointment, or even accompany them to the first visit if they feel anxious.


• Remind them that help is available: Depression can make someone feel hopeless, but reminding them that help is available can give them the encouragement they need to take the next step.

When someone is dealing with depression, even simple tasks can feel overwhelming. Offering practical assistance can help lighten their load and show that you’re there for them.

Ways to provide practical help:

• Help with daily tasks: Offer to help with grocery shopping, preparing meals, doing laundry, or cleaning. Sometimes, just knowing that someone else is handling the little things can be a big relief.


• Encourage small steps: Depression can make it hard to take care of oneself. Gently encourage small actions, like going for a walk together or eating a nutritious meal, without pressuring them to do too much at once.

Recovery from depression doesn’t happen overnight, and it’s essential to be patient and compassionate with your loved one as they go through this process. There will be good days and bad days, and it’s important to remain supportive through both.

How to practice patience:

• Avoid frustration: It can be hard to watch someone you care about struggle, but getting frustrated or impatient won’t help. Understand that progress can be slow and non-linear.


• Resist taking it personally: Depression can cause someone to withdraw or act irritably, but it’s not a reflection of how they feel about you. Try not to take their behaviour personally, and instead offer understanding.


• Reassure them of your support: Regularly check in with them, even if they don’t always respond. Let them know that you’re there for them, no matter what.

It can be tempting to say things like, “You’ll get over it,” or “Just think positively,” but these statements can come across as dismissive or unhelpful. Depression is a serious condition that often requires more than just positive thinking to overcome.

What not to say:

• Avoid clichés: Phrases like “Cheer up” or “It’s all in your head” minimize their experience and invalidate their feelings. Instead, acknowledge their pain and remind them you’re there for them.


• Don’t offer comparisons: Avoid comparing their situation to others or your own experiences, as this can make them feel misunderstood. Everyone’s experience with depression is different.


• Be careful with advice: Unless they specifically ask for advice, focus on listening and offering support rather than trying to solve their problems.

While professional treatment is essential, healthy habits such as regular exercise, good sleep hygiene, and a balanced diet can also support recovery. Gently encourage your loved one to incorporate these habits into their routine, without pressuring them.

How to encourage healthy habits:

• Suggest gentle activities: Invite them to join you for a walk, yoga, or a fun activity that doesn’t feel overwhelming. Exercise can boost mood, but it’s important not to push too hard.


• Promote good sleep habits: Encourage a regular sleep schedule, as poor sleep can worsen depression.


• Help with meals: If they’re struggling with nutrition, offer to make a meal together or drop off healthy snacks. Eating well can improve energy levels and mood.

Supporting someone with depression can be emotionally draining, and it’s important to recognise your own limits.

How to protect your well-being:

• Set boundaries: Make sure to set boundaries and take care of your own emotional health. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so it’s essential to prioritize self-care.


• Seek support for yourself: If supporting someone with depression is taking a toll on your own mental health, consider talking to a therapist or support group.


• Know when to step back: If your loved one is resistant to help or their behaviour becomes harmful, it’s okay to step back and encourage them to seek professional help. Remember that you can’t “fix” their depression on your own.

In severe cases of depression, there is a risk of suicidal thoughts or behaviours. If your loved one expresses feelings of hopelessness, talks about death, or shows signs of self-harm, it’s critical to take these signs seriously and seek immediate help.

What to do:

• Ask directly: If you’re worried about their safety, don’t be afraid to ask, “Are you thinking about harming yourself?” This can help them open up about their feelings.


• Take action: If they express suicidal thoughts, stay with them and seek professional help immediately. Call a suicide hotline, their therapist, or take them to the nearest emergency room.


• Offer continued support: Let them know that you’re there for them and encourage them to connect with a mental health professional for ongoing support.


• Supporting someone with depression requires empathy, patience, and a willingness to be there through the highs and lows. Dr Kim writes, "Overall, the goal of helping a loved one or friend with depression is to be caring and supportive, but also realistic and open to their state of mind."

Disclaimer: This article, including health and fitness advice, only provides generic information. Don’t treat it as a substitute for qualified medical opinion. Always consult a specialist for specific health diagnosis.