Adultery had a crap year too

When adultery was declared no longer a criminal offence back in 2018 – a good old year we should have kissed daily for not being 2020 or 2021 – everyone who happened to be in someone else’s bedroom at the time heaved a sigh of relief. Now nothing could stop them from going out and finding love in all the wrong places, they thought. Then Covid happened, arresting all roving eyes.

People have only yawns to report while recapping the past two years. With falling in love complicating itself in the new masked, sanitised, socially distanced, work-from-home era, it is the future of extramarital affairs really that hangs by a thread. Though exact figures are yet to be computed, this much is clear: compared to 2019, the following two years saw nil or futile communication between consenting adults. As far as amour is concerned, married couples tried to contain it at home in 2021. On the plus side, they had some practice overlap from 2020. Canoodling with spouse became the default setting.

Once upon a time men and women woke up, groaned about going to work but eventually reached workplaces - shampooed and perfumed. Where waited for them, apart from a job they must pretend to tackle in a busy and even aggressive way, romance if they so sought. The world was full of interesting people who met your eyes in a delicious way and the air heavy with possibilities. If, at any point, you changed your mind, there was always the exit route, the cast-iron excuse of domestic bliss waiting at home. Yes, it took some manoeuvring and manipulating getting in and out of such trysts, but that was part of the fun. Whatever be it - ego or empathy - excitement was guaranteed. Affairees went about their life with silly smiles on face and secret plans on phone.

Post-Covid, romance took a big hit. Hotels booked by stealthy lovers who came in with barely suppressed excitement they tried very hard to hide and obviously fake names, who never complained about the breakfast buffet or the view, and who went away before their allotted time was up, are now shutting themselves down for lack of business. Out of town visitors, giggly and tipsy, playing footsie now a sepia memory.