At some point in life, we’ve all been there and felt a strong urge to be in love with someone special. Although, a lot of times we just end up replaying conversations, overanalysing texts, and wondering if they feel the same way. Unrequited love or one sided love is the unexpected ache of loving someone who doesn’t love you back. Often, what starts as admiration turns into emotional imbalance, where one person invests deeply while the other barely notices.
Here’s how to identify a one-sided relationship, understand why it happens, and find the strength to move on.
1. You always make the first move: If you’re the one constantly texting, calling, or planning meetups, and they rarely initiate, that’s your first red flag. Love should be a dialogue, not a monologue.
2. You justify their indifference: When they cancel plans or go silent for days, you tell yourself they’re “just busy.” But if you’re always rationalising their lack of effort, you’re ignoring the truth — they may not be as invested as you are.
3. You feel drained, not fulfilled: Relationships, even in their early stages, should bring joy. If your connection leaves you anxious, restless, or constantly seeking validation, it’s one-sided.
Also Read: 7 simple habits that couples in a lasting relationship follow
4. You don’t feel seen or heard: You remember every detail about them, but they barely recall what you told them last week. If your emotions and experiences go unnoticed, it’s a sign that the emotional weight isn’t balanced.
5. You make excuses for them: When you find yourself explaining away their cold behaviour or ghosting to friends with some excuse and most of the time you’re covering for emotional neglect.
6. You live for the little moments: A single compliment or text feels like a big win. You start reading too much into crumbs of affection because you’re starving for attention.
7. You avoid talking about feelings: Deep down, you know the answer you might get. If the idea of asking “Do you feel the same way?” fills you with dread, it’s because you fear confirming what you already suspect.
8. Your self-worth takes a hit: Unrequited love can slowly erode confidence. You start believing you’re not enough and not attractive, smart, or interesting. When in truth, you just picked someone emotionally unavailable.
9. Your world revolves around them: You plan your day around their messages, their moods, their schedule. Meanwhile, they’re living their life independently of you. That imbalance hurts most when you finally notice it.
How to move on gracefully?
One-sided love often stems from projection and is based on perception — we fall for the idea of someone rather than who they truly are. Sometimes, it’s linked to past experiences where affection felt conditional, making us chase approval. Or we confuse chemistry for connection, believing if we try harder, they’ll eventually love us back.
Also Read: What is ‘Mankeeping’, a trend that’s making women question relationship choices
The first step toward healing is to face the truth. Once you acknowledge what’s really happening, try to speak up if you can; knowing where you stand helps you stop guessing and start healing. Redirect your energy into activities and people who reciprocate your care and attention — the ones who make you feel valued, not invisible. Set emotional boundaries for yourself; don’t stalk their social media and work on rebuilding your self-worth.
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