It is very common for individuals to procrastinate their estate plans. While the reasons for procrastination may be varied, a dominant one is the emotional aspect of devising such plans. Estate planning is often considered a legal and technical matter where one devises legal documents such as Wills, Private Family Trust Deeds, General Power of Attorney, etc, to define the distribution and management of their assets, especially post their lifetime.
However, it is as much an emotional journey filled with an array of feelings such as anxiety, guilt, rivalry, fear and anguish, amongst other strong emotions that may be experienced by the family members.
The anticipation of having to deal with such emotional discomfort often discourages families from devising an estate plan altogether, which is not a favourable situation for the family, both from the perspective of their wealth and relationships.
Let us understand a few common emotional situations that most families face:
1. Discussing the Demise of a Loved One: It is very discomforting for families to discuss a situation when their family member won’t be around them. It is a particularly nerve-racking situation for families where the concerned loved one is responsible for all decisions related to investing and managing the family wealth — especially in cases where the other family members are not very investment savvy and are unaware of the family wealth.
2. Taboo Topic: Estate planning is a tricky topic of discussion. Firstly, discussing estate planning makes families uncomfortable as it brings to the fore a significant event in their lives which is the demise of a loved one – the mere discussion of which is considered ominous by many. And secondly, in situations where the children/younger generation bring up this subject for discussion it may not be accepted in the right spirit and has chances to sour relationships among family members.
3. Loss of Control: The plan for the distribution of wealth can often lead to a situation that may demand the patriarch to renounce control over his assets/business. This makes it an emotionally draining decision as it may make one feel that he/she has to give up his/her years of identity, power and control thereby making it difficult for one to detach oneself and hand over the wealth/empire to the next generation.
Also read | Senior citizens and estate planning: 8 crucial mistakes to avoid
4. Division of Wealth/Assets: Another tough decision that one needs to make is how to distribute the wealth among one’s loved ones. While one may want to be fair with all family members such an ideal situation may not always be possible and that can lead to anxiety and animosity amongst the family members.
5. Medical Condition: Estate planning also involves envisaging a situation where a family member may be incapacitated to manage his/her financial and non-financial affairs. Such a situation is again unpleasant for a family to envision and plan for it rationally. This can also be emotionally overwhelming when it involves caretaking of a special needs child/adult after the demise of his/her parents or a situation where minor children are left without parents.
Also read | There is a way: How fraudulent wills can be detected
So, how should one navigate the emotional side of estate planning?
1. Acknowledge the Emotional Journey: The first step towards dealing with any challenging situation is to acknowledge the problem. Hence, it is important to recognise the emotions when devising an estate plan and deal with them constructively as against leaving them unattended. Estate planning can be emotionally and mentally daunting, therefore undertaking emotional preparedness may prove to be useful.
2. An Early Start: Estate planning decisions are not encouraged to be taken only in the golden years of your life. Begin to plan early as this gives you the opportunity to process your emotions, makes the family aware of the importance of such a plan early on as well gives them the chance to appreciate your thought process as they have an opportunity to discuss it with you. Further, as your assets will grow in size over the years it can lead to increased complexity that may not motivate you to deal with the complications at a later stage in your life. Remember an estate plan can evolve over a period of time to reflect your current situation but do not wait for a perfect day to begin devising your plan.
Also read | Plan to write your Will? Here’s the data you need to collect before you begin
3. Transparent Discussions: Have an open and honest discussion with your family about your wishes, intentions, and rationale for your decisions. While you may be sceptical as to how your desires will be received by your family, providing such a platform where everyone has the opportunity to speak and seek clarity on the plan and its rationale will foster an environment of trust and cooperation.
4. Engaging Professional Assistance: Estate planning discussions can often trigger underlying tensions among family members and therefore need to be dealt with empathy and caution. Further, dealing with the views and opinions of family members from different generations, values and lifestyles can add to the complexity. Therefore, involving professional experts such as an estate planner may prove to be useful. Such a person can act as a neutral third party that may guide the family through the process as well as help mediate and ease emotional tensions.
It is essential that one views an estate plan as not just an execution of legal documents but acknowledges the importance of navigating the emotional elements involved in the process with compassion, empathy, and adeptness as it holds great importance for the ultimate success of the estate plan.
Discover the latest Business News, Sensex, and Nifty updates. Obtain Personal Finance insights, tax queries, and expert opinions on Moneycontrol or download the Moneycontrol App to stay updated!
