Abhishek Bachchan, a devoted father to 13-year-old Aaradhya Bachchan, recently shared his views on parenting, emphasising the importance of distinguishing between being a parent and a friend. While promoting his upcoming film Be Happy, in which he plays a girl dad, he spoke about the significance of setting boundaries with children.
Abhishek Bachchan’s take on parenting
In an interview with NDTV, Abhishek addressed the question of whether parents should be friends with their children. He explained, “Be friendly with your child, but it's crucial not to be their friend. As a parent, your role is to provide guidance, protection, comfort, and love.”
He stressed the importance of maintaining parental authority, clarifying that while children should feel at ease confiding in their parents, they must also understand the respect and responsibility that come with the parent-child dynamic. “There is a certain decorum—not just because I brought you into this world, but because I am responsible for raising, caring for, loving, and providing for you,” he elaborated.
Abhishek also highlighted the role of parents as a constant support system, ensuring that children always feel secure in knowing their parents will stand by them. Concluding his thoughts, he reiterated, “It’s important to be friendly with your children, but you shouldn't be their friend.”
Which is the best parenting style?
Parenting styles have been extensively studied in developmental psychology, with research pointing toward the authoritative parenting style as the most effective in fostering emotional well-being, resilience, and social competence in children.
"This style balanced warmth and responsiveness with structure and discipline, providing a nurturing environment while setting clear expectations," explains Neha Cadabam, senior child psychologist at Cadabams Hospital, Bengaluru.
Diana Baumrind, a US-based clinical psychologist known for her research on parenting style, classified parenting into four main styles—authoritative, authoritarian, permissive and neglectful. Authoritative parenting, she suggests, consistently leads to better emotional regulation, self-discipline and academic success in children.
Also Read | Parenting tips: 8 essential life skills that must be taught from an early age
Should parents be friends to their children?
The idea of parents being their children's 'friends' is controversial in child psychology. "While a strong emotional bond and open communication are crucial, research suggests that a parent's role should primarily be that of a guide rather than a peer," Cadabam notes.
A study in the Journal of Adolescence found that when parents adopt a purely friendship-based approach, children may struggle with self-discipline, respect for boundaries and decision-making skills.
Parents should strive to be warm, approachable and understanding while maintaining the role of a mentor rather than an equal.
"Children thrive when they respect their parents as figures of guidance and protection, rather than seeing them as friends who might bend rules or avoid necessary discipline. The key lies in a balanced, authoritative approach—nurturing, but firm in expectations and values," Cadabam concludes.
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