After being ghosted online, London founder hosts IRL events to find love: ‘I got to dating burnout’

The event begins with an hour-long activity—like cricket or touch rugby—followed by socializing with the full group. (Image generated by AI)

After years of being ghosted and emotionally drained by dating apps, London-based entrepreneur Lucy Rout decided to fix the problem herself. The 30-year-old cancer survivor and founder of Haystack Dating told CNBC Make It that her confidence had “never been lower” while using traditional platforms.

“There is no way in hell that people in real life would have said to me some of the things they said on dating apps. People behave better. They’re kinder,” Rout said.

From ghosting to group cricket
Haystack Dating blends tech with curated in-person events. Attendees fill out a form that feeds into an algorithm matching them with small groups based on personality traits and shared interests. The evening begins with an hour-long activity—like cricket or touch rugby—followed by socializing with the full group.

So far, events have drawn between 200 and 500 people, with 92 percent attending solo. Tickets cost around £30 (about Rs 3,500), and Rout says the return rate is high. “You don’t go back if you’ve had a bad experience,” she said.

A founder shaped by experience
Before Haystack, Rout created Tabuu, a pill case startup that secured investment on BBC’s Dragon’s Den in 2023. She built the business remotely from Colombia while documenting her life and dating frustrations on Instagram, where she now has nearly 50,000 followers.

In December 2023, she met her current boyfriend at a networking event and later flew 10,000 miles to South-East Asia for their fourth date. That same month, she was developing Haystack.

Dating apps lose ground
An OFCOM report from late 2024, CNBC quoted, showed declining usage across major dating apps. Rout believes IRL dating is making a comeback. “Yes, you can meet five Hinge dates in a week, or you can come to one pub once and meet a few hundred,” she said. “I got to dating burnout. I’m not going to do this anymore—I’m going to fix it for other people.”